When the Mindset Wakes Up Before the Muscles Do

There are seasons in a woman’s life when the body keeps score long before the heart catches up.

Where everything feels heavy — the toys, the laundry baskets, the endless bending and lifting and sorting that stretch across the days.

Where strength feels distant, movement feels scattered, and the body you once lived in with ease feels like a place you’re learning how to re-enter.

These past months have been that season for me.

Not lost, but layered.

Not broken, but stretched thin in ways that don’t show on the surface.

Motherhood, postpartum healing, sleepless nights, newborn rhythms, managing a home, caring for Matthew and Marian, and preparing myself to return to work in January — all of it takes a toll in quiet, invisible ways.

But something changed recently.

And surprisingly, it didn’t start in the gym.

It didn’t start with a workout program or a perfect routine.

It started with a mindset — a shift so subtle I almost missed it.

I was sore from days of cleaning, decluttering, lifting bins, bending over toys, wandering the house trying to get ahead of the season.

And not the “good” sore I used to know — not the kind from a barbell or a WOD or an intentional training session.

This was the tired, achy soreness of a body doing too much without structure.

In that moment, I felt it:

I miss the version of movement that supports my life instead of draining it.

I miss CrossFit — not for the workouts, but for what it does to my body… and to my mind.

Because when I am in seasons of training,

I move better.

I stand taller.

I lift with purpose.

I breathe differently.

I feel stronger in every corner of my actual life.

And I realized something I hadn’t let myself say out loud:

I’m ready to wake back up.

Not just physically.

Mentally.

Emotionally.

Spiritually.

Ready to return to the mindset I know well — the one that chooses alignment over impulse, intention over autopilot, strength over survival mode.

A few days later, I made a small choice at lunch — nothing dramatic, nothing “fitness influencer” worthy.

Just a different choice. A more aligned one.

And in that moment, I felt something spark inside me, the tiniest reminder:

This is who you are.

This is how you think when you’re connected to yourself.

This is your athlete mind waking back up.

It reminded me of a song that has always carried a certain truth for me:

“Wake Me Up” by Avicii.

The lyrics hit differently now:

“I tried carrying the weight of the world…”

“I didn’t know I was lost…”

“Feeling my way through the darkness, guided by a beating heart…”

This whole season has felt like feeling my way through the darkness — being guided by what still beats, still hopes, still believes.

And now I feel it:

The awakening.

The becoming.

The slow, steady rise of the woman I am stepping into next.

I am not trying to return to who I was.

I’m not chasing an old PR or an old version of myself.

I am honoring her… and moving forward with everything I’ve learned.

Because this season is different.

I am different.

And the mindset that’s waking up inside me is one that fits the life I have now — the motherhood, the healing, the responsibilities, the purpose, the heart, the grief, the growth.

This is my re-entry.

Gentle.

Intentional.

Aligned.

Built on respect instead of pressure.

It’s not about perfection.

It’s not about performance.

It’s about choosing to become the woman I’m meant to be — one aligned choice at a time.

And if I had to put this entire season into one sentence, it would be this:

“I honor who I’ve been, and I’m becoming who I am meant to be.”

This is the awakening.

This is the becoming.

This is me — stepping back into movement, strength, and alignment with a heart that is ready to rise again.